Crying

Cried at work today. Not a really big thing but I was so angry that I wasn't being listened to, that I had to let the emotion out. And I guess it's better your boss thinks you're a big girl than an angry bit.

I'm not the first one though. The new curriculum is killing joy.

Three day weekend.

I don't actually have a three day weekend; I did a 13 hour day yesterday and will be back on Monday.

But I took 5 students on an 8 hour round-trip to see a show. I loved it.

It did NOT feel like work. It was an outing with people I got to know much better and hopefully will have better relationships with.

All I can say is, having the chance to have that day is something I am honoured to have in my job.

And I realised that I am so proud to be called 'Miss'. I realised it yesterday. Like when women say their name is now Mum, my name is Miss. And I must say, I am honoured, and filled with love for the special people I allow to know me as such.

ANZAC Day

I am thankful. I remember. I don't always feel the need to go out to remember and pay homage to those who died. Especially the volunteers and conscriptees in earlier wars.

But living in a small town I have to go out. Our students do a march and they're  in school uniform so we have to go. We look after them all.

It took over an hour for the service to go on. I was so proud of them. We had 20 of them aged 7 or under, 4 at 4, and they sat IN SILENCE for the entire time. Yes, there was lots of squirming and wriggling, but they did so well. Even the 15 year olds made me proud.

We pledged allegiance to Queen Elizabeth II which is kind of odd. But you know what? It kind of made sense. We are still a Commonwealth country and we are commemorating something that happened in service to her. Well, her father anyway.

Then we sang God Save The Queen. I know the lyrics because my grandmother taught us the decades ago because she was telling us about singing it as God save the Cat attack school. It was funny seeing the kids looking confused. But was really funny seeing the adults around standing not singing either.

I did enjoy the day.

Musical

Am writing it. About to do auditions.

Looking forward to it but it'll really show me how much I can let go.

The willing horse

That. Above. There. See it?

That's who I am. I am willing to go out of my way to help people and I am absolutely happy to give of myself for my work. I really am.

But I was talking to someone and they said, "Be careful, 'cause you are the willing horse and the willing horse often gets flogged."

I thought yeah I know but whatever.

But then yep. I'm doing so much for nothing back.

I don't need to get lots of recognition but something would be nice. And really don't just dump stuff on me. Ask if I can do it. I have no formal title. I am just a staff member. I'm happy to do stuff if I'm asked but just to be told and have things demanded sucks.

Exhaustion

<p>Exhaustion sucks. I did 4 days of work this week and feel as tired as I did after a full year of work. Gonna beat the attrition rate but don't think I'll do this forever. Too emotionally draining.

Nervous breakdowns are common.

Watermelon

I have a shirt that is slightly a watermelon/Rockmelon colour... But it's a lovely colour and I feel good in myself.

Which is needed tonight when my subjects are likely to change again tomorrow.

Changes

I know changes occur. I know that. And, really, I'm not too bothered by the changes this week. But I am.

My timetable has changed. No big deal. Except I'm teaching more primary classes per week than secondary.

So much for being secondary curriculum coordinator.

Or the co senior school specialist.

I'm the person who's versatile enough to be mucked around.

But I am looking forward to the challenge of Prep afternoon sport.

4 year olds people!

My training is for 12-17 year olds. Surely they're the same right?

Quick one

Major changes today. Not really stressed about it, but I think the first time I'm in a class with 7 year olds I might have a "wtf am I doing here?" moment.

I'm a high school teachers people! What do I do with 7 year olds?

Day two

I don't want this blog to turn into a blow by blow of each day, so it won't.

I wanted to post today about how I'm not solely in charge, or on paper and how that's actually ok. I've still got lots of plans that I am gonna implement and I think they will help. I do. I just have to get the others on board.

One of my new teachers is actually a veteran teacher but so scared about stepping into a totally new subject I've spent hours object on her planning but not mine. And you know what? I'm happy to do it. It means I'm gonna be at work for hours on the weekend to be ready, but that's ok.

And I'd appreciate if the photocopier was working!

Back again

Today was the first pupil free day for the year. The first anything at work for me. Which I'm very grateful for.

My air conditioning is making a funny noise as a side note...

There seems to have been a bit of over stepping on behalf of an old team member. Turns out I'm not as needed as I was told last year. Really trying to look at as a weight that's been lifted, and really it has - I mean, now I can really concentrate on teaching.

But I like being in charge...

Not really. Can I have a role where I can tell people how a subject is to be run without the responsibility if it gets mucked up? No? Aw, shucks.

Multi-years in the Australian History Curriculum

It doesn't work! How in God's name can I get these topics to fit in with one another to make teaching multi-years easier? I am scared witless as the idea of having to teach two totally separate topics in the same room. Not only the extra planning, but getting the message through to the kids and doing the topics justice.

If we were given just a broad overview of 8 - the ancient and medieval word, 9 - The expanding world and 10 - the modern world, I could work with that!

Do thematic units - for example, PLAGUE! and teach the Black Death to year 8, The Spanish Flu to year 9 and SARS and Swineflu and the possibilities of another to year 10. That, I could do. The same kind of content, with slightly differing focusses for the research assessment.

But that's not how I interpret it.

The Curriculum outlines an overview curricula and then 'in depth' curricula. And dear God they don't match. Not at all. Not even the same themes!

Note to the writers - we don't all have perfect little classes of 30 students to whom we can write the program once and then not have to wholly re-write again each year. I don't know how may kids are going to be in my class or the year levels until the end of the year before, and I then have to re-write the program in totality! 

Make it easy for people please - I thought that was the whole friggin' point? To tell us the 'what' to teach, but not the 'how'? Yes, you've done that, but you haven't considered people like our tiny little school who need to run a year 8/9 combined SOSE and, maybe, include the year 10s in there.

Oh, and I've got to fill 90% of the year with in-depth studies? So how do I get Geography, Business and Civics into the SOSE curriculum. We don't all have the luxury of having separate teachers - we have four teachers. FOUR! We can't separate it out because we don't really have the staff to cover it all. Or the kids.

That's my rant about the History Curriculum. I will now put it to the back of my mind, because it doesn't go 'live' until 2013, while the English on goes live in 2012.

And I still haven't written my Term 4, 2011 units.

**DISCLAIMER - I think that the curriculum is well thought out and written. I am looking forward to teaching some of the topics and I believe the content that has been chosen is very engaging and relevant. I am talking about my ability to do the topics justice in a multi-years setting.***